Gita 6.35

Sadhak: "Guruji, Krishna says the mind can be controlled through practice and dispassion. But I've been practicing meditation for years, and my mind is still all over the place. What am I doing wrong?"

Guru: "First, let's appreciate that Krishna himself says 'durnigraham'—difficult to restrain. Not 'easy with the right technique.' You are working with something inherently challenging. But tell me: your practice of years—has it been continuous, or with breaks? Has it been with full engagement, or half-hearted?"

Sadhak: "Well, I've had periods of intense practice, then months where I barely sat. And honestly, even when I practice, part of me is just waiting for it to be over."

Guru: "There is your answer. Abhyāsa requires continuity and wholehearted engagement. A fire lit and extinguished repeatedly never builds enough heat to transform. Your pattern is understandable—we all struggle with consistency—but you cannot blame the medicine for not working when you take it sporadically."

Sadhak: "And what about vairagya? I understand practice, but dispassion seems like it requires already having what I'm trying to achieve. How can I be dispassionate when I'm so attached?"

Guru: "Vairāgya is not a switch you flip but a direction you travel. Start with gross attachments—the objects and experiences you clearly see causing suffering. As you release these, subtler attachments become visible. Dispassion grows through repeated seeing that objects don't deliver what they promise. Each disappointment, if met with awareness rather than just seeking the next object, becomes vairāgya teaching."

Sadhak: "So I need both simultaneously? Practice AND dispassion? That seems like a lot."

Guru: "They are not separate burdens but complementary supports. Practice reveals attachments you didn't know you had—sit in meditation and watch what the mind craves. Dispassion makes practice possible—without some release of the pull toward distractions, you cannot sustain sitting. Each feeds the other. You don't need perfect vairāgya to begin practice, nor perfect abhyāsa to develop dispassion. They grow together."

Sadhak: "How long will this take? Sometimes it feels endless."

Guru: "The honest answer: it varies. Some minds are more restless than others; some karmic patterns are deeper. But the trajectory matters more than the timeline. Are you more able to return from distraction now than a year ago? Can you sit a bit longer, with slightly less resistance? These incremental changes, accumulated over time, constitute transformation. The mind that needed decades to become restless will need sustained effort to become still."

Sadhak: "What if I feel dispassionate toward practice itself? Sometimes I don't want to meditate at all."

Guru: "That is not vairāgya—that is tamas, inertia disguised as wisdom. True vairāgya releases attachment to outcomes and distractions, not to the practice itself. If you don't want to practice, examine why. Usually it is attachment to comfort, entertainment, or avoiding what meditation reveals. The dispassion we cultivate is toward obstacles, not toward the path."

Sadhak: "Krishna seems so confident that this works. But the mind has been restless for lifetimes, hasn't it?"

Guru: "Yes, and that is precisely why abhyāsa must be sustained and vairāgya must be genuine. You are working against lifetimes of momentum. But momentum is not destiny. Every time you return attention from wandering, you weaken the habit of wandering. Every time you release a craving, you weaken the pattern of craving. Krishna's confidence is based on this truth: the mind's restlessness is conditioned, not essential. What conditioning created, deconditioning can undo."